What I want my parents to know....

Here it is, another night before the first day of school. It's my fifth "first day of school night" in my career, and it is just as scary as my first (sorry my new teacher friends; that feeling doesn't go away!).
I have met most of my students and their parents and have answered all of the questions they have asked. But I see their unanswered questions in their eyes. "Will this lady love my child like I do? Will this woman see the good I see? Will she make sure my child is protected? What makes this lady qualified?"


I know you know the state of Kansas recognizes me as a highly qualified teacher. You know that I was hand picked three years ago to help open a brand new school; something that I consider quite an honor and am very proud of. You know my principal has stated that he chose the best of the best to work here. But you see a young(ish) teacher standing in front of you. I want you to know that I am entering my fifth year of teaching, and I am 26. You should know that I went straight to college and would have graduated a year early if my credits had transferred properly. Instead I graduated a half semester early. That should tell you about my work ethic. You should know that while in college, I got married and then pregnant and all of my professors plus my advisor told me to take a year off because it would be too hard to keep up with everything. You should know I was bound and determined to finish what I started, and was back in the classroom a week after my daughter was born to fulfill the requirements needed to pass my classes. How's that for dedication and determination?


But that's not important either. What I really want you to know? I get it. I understand how hard it is to drop your most precious gift off every morning and have no idea what they are doing all day long. I know what it's like to have your baby come home with a hurt heart because someone was mean to them at recess. I know what it feels like to want to go up to the school and ask that kid (or his/her parent) what in the world is wrong with them. My daughter had a horrible year of pre-k. She developed some pretty severe anxiety and you better believe I was an advocate for her. When she told me a kid tried to push her off the slide, I wanted to tell her that so and so is a terrible kid and that she should stay away from them. But instead, we prayed for her classmate. Because you see, even though I am in a fabulous school with amazing kids, parents, and co-workers, I still have kids who are scared to go home. Kids who don't know where their next meal is going to come from. Kids with pain and hurt that you can't even begin to imagine. Kids that need my daughter's love and friendship.


My daughter is going into kindergarten this year, and even though I know her teacher personally, and know how wonderful she is, I have the same questions and fears that you have. Will my baby make friends? Will anyone play with her on the playground? Will someone make fun of her? Who's going to make sure she eats all her lunch? Who's going to make sure she's not sad at recess? And a million other questions running through my mind. I am at the same school my daughter is at; it would be very easy for me to eat lunch with her and go to recess with her every day. But I'm not going to. Because I love my child enough to let her go. That kid that's mean to my kid? My daughter doesn't need to know what I'm really thinking. She needs to know how to deal with all sorts of people in this world, because mommy won't be there in college or in the real world to hold her hand and to fix it for her. I will teach my child how to handle herself with grace, and how to stand up for herself.


I want you to know, that I already know that your child's favorite color is red. And that if I can incorporate that into what we are doing, your child might have more interest. I already know what triggers your kid and I already have a plan for when that happens. I have been watching them and making connections with them for two years. Your kid is new to the school......guess what? I already know that your kid takes awhile to warm up, likes to joke, hates to read. I already know what kind of books I need to find for your kid (joke books of course). You see, I make it my mission to KNOW my precious babies. If I don't already have a connection with your child, give me a week or two.


I know you know what kids are the "bad kids". What kids you do not, under any circumstances, want your child sitting next to or playing with at recess. If only you knew what this poor, precious soul has going on in his/her life. This kid needs love, compassion, and friendship in the worst way. And you, you amazing parent, have raised your child well. Your child is going to be just fine in the real world. But this kid? He might not be so lucky. He needs your child to be that role model and friend. She needs that child to say, this isn't right. Would you like to come play with us?


I want you to know that I would without a doubt take a bullet for your child. I know my child's teacher would do the same. I want you to know that I have about fifteen different ideas for getting each and every student out of my room safely if the need ever arises. Yes, as an overprotective parent, this thought unfortunately crosses my mind a lot.


This is all a big jumbled mess of a post, but I have one last thing I want you to know.
Today, before I went home, I went around and sat at every single desk. All 20 of them. And I took a moment to pray for your child. I prayed for guidance, patience, and for very specific things unique to your child. Because they are all special, precious gifts. And they are the people you cherish the most. I have a huge responsibility in front of me, to not only educate, but to love your child and take care of your child to the best of my ability. Times 20. For 9 months. Remember, the child you don't want yours sitting next to is another parents' precious baby. And nine times out of ten, that parent is doing all they can. And I promise you, I will be on guard for your child every single day. But you have to promise me to come to me when there is a problem. To not assume I already know, and did nothing about it. Remember, I have 20 children to look after as if they were my own. As a parent, I totally get it. As a parent to one, sometimes I miss things. I'm not looking and my daughter gets hurt. Multiply that by 20. So please, be an advocate for your child, but approach me with kindness and compassion. Please, take a second to think before speaking in front of your child about me, or about one of their classmates. Please know that I am doing everything I can for your child, and that there are things I legally can not tell you about. So even thought it may look like I'm doing nothing, please know that I am.


Most of all, please know that I love your child. I haven't even had them in my classroom yet, but I already love and cherish each and every one of them. I'm just as nervous as you and your child are about school tomorrow. That's why I'm up writing this jumbled mess, because the thoughts in my brain won't shut off. I have about a million things in my head that I need to remember for tomorrow. Procedures, schedules, a special surprise for the kids, etc...but right now I really need that elusive sleep. Even without it, I will give 110% to your child tomorrow. I will have patience like a saint, will be calm and collected, and pray that I can continue to do that after the school day so that my own child can have a patient and calm mommy.


One last thing; I want you to know that your support and help mean the world to me. I want you to know that I appreciate your willingness to leave your kid with me, a total stranger (we won't be for long!), and trust that I will love and protect them. And maybe even teach them a thing or two :) I want you to know that I am so excited and ready to see your sweet baby's face. I can't wait to hear about their summer, and I can't wait to fill their brains with a love of learning. Here's to an absolutely amazing year!

Random thoughts of a jogger blogger :)

So first of all, I haven't done much with my blog because I was waiting for it to be PERFECT and thanks to Becca at Jumping Jax Designs, it is!! Seriously people, go check her out! She was incredible to work with and answered all of my questions (seeing as I am pretty new to all of this and really don't know what I'm doing!).


So as most of you know, I decided I would run a half marathon in October. Without even being able to run three miles. Well, that was dumb. I am determined that I'm going to do this though! I have some awesome friends that will be running with me and even though they are already up to like a million (ok seven) miles, I know I can catch up! Unfortunately I've had to run on the treadmill a little more than I would like to so tonight I was determined to get my long run done outside. I drove over to Casey's, parked the car, took a deep breath, and off I went. Totally unprepared with no iPod, so this is the conversation I had with myself over those four long, painful, boring miles:


-Ok, I can do this! No big deal!
-Ugh, I'm not even at a mile yet?!
-Why is running so hard?!
-Why is it so hot? Why is the air so thick?!

-I need some water. Can't wait for my water pack thing from Beachbody to get here. I love getting free stuff. I wonder what that thing is really called?
-Maybe I should just walk a while.....
-Do not stop!
-I wonder what those high school boys yelling at me would say if they knew I was 26, a wife, and mom?
-This means I've still got it!!! Makes me feel good! And super old!
-I really want ice cream. Or pizza. Or a beer.
-Holy shit, holy shit, my calf is going to explode! Like it's going to rip open and pieces of meat and flesh and blood will fly everywhere. That would be incredibly gross. I wonder if anyone would stop to save me?
-I'm going to have some killer legs some day!
-Why am I doing this?!
-Oh yeah, killer legs.
 -Oooo his cologne smells good.
-Wow, I smell terrible.
-Don't forget to breathe.
-Don't breathe so hard!
-Gotta pass the lady walking the dog. Remember to not sound like I'm about to die.
-I wonder how crazy I'd look if I ran through their sprinklers?
-Wow that guy is fast. I bet he's not running as far as I am.
-Am I running too fast? I think so. ... now I'm running too slow. I totally don't understand this whole "pace" thing.
-Am I almost done?
-Why in the world did I think I would ever be able to run 13 miles. Maybe I should find a run to do later in the year. But then Christie will kill me.
 -Should have gone to the bathroom before I left the house. Mom problems!
-I better lose 4 pounds like Jes on the 3 Day Refresh!
-I wonder if the fiber sweep is as gross as they all say?
-I need to announce my new coach and get my new coaches enrolled in training!
-Oh look at that squirrel. Reminds me of that movie. ...
-I see way too may kid movies. I wonder what the last adult movie I saw in a theater was?
-There's the car. I'm going to sprint.
-Sprinting is a terrible idea. I really need to puke. And pee. And drink water. And eat pizza. And take a shower.
-Do not forget the ipod next time!!!!

 So is this just me? Or are there more of you like me out there?!


I am happy to say that even with all that craziness going on in my head, I did get my run finished. Even though it was slow and painful (that darn right calf!!), it was better than sitting on the couch!